I must say that Katherine was really on the ball when in came to keeping track of who gave us what and writing thank you letters for all the great gifts we received at our wedding in a timely manner. Unfortunately, she decided not to include any popular science fiction references in her letters. So, this post is for everyone who would enjoy a Star Trek/Star Wars thank you letter.
Katherine checked the mail this weekend, and in with the usual credit card applications, random advertisements, and various other justifications for keeping the US Postal service busy, we found an oversized envelope from our wedding photographer. She sent us over 700 images on three CDs from our wedding. I’ve included a few here, and a whole lot more on my facebook page.
All of these photographs were taken by Angie Taylor, a professional photographer who specializes in weddings in the Denver metro area.
I uploaded the video of our wedding ceremony up to YouTube last night. Here are they are: (YouTube restricts the length of uploads, so I split it into two seven minute clips)
Not much to say on this post. I’m waiting for the photographer to send me the photographs from the wedding. Angie did her job and then some– storing more than 800 images on her digital camera. Hopefully I’ll be smiling decently in at least one of them 🙂
I don’t know exactly why, but I don’t smile very well, especially when someone tells me to smile for a picture. Katherine can smile for three hours straight and looks great– she doesn’t know why I have such a hard time looking happy.
If anyone has digital pictures of the wedding they would like to share, send me a link to them on the “Contact Omar” page and I’ll post the link on this post.
What are these numbers– winning lottery numbers? The numbers printed on the mysterious hatch on the television show “Lost”? The combination to my luggage?
No, these were the table numbers at our wedding. Instead of starting at 1 and ending at 8, we decided to make our table numbers have multiple purposes. In addition to telling people where to sit, each number represented an important milestone in our lives– measured in days.
Anyone who has been to a wedding with a buffet knows that you can’t just let everyone get up and start filling their plates all at once. So I went around to tables and asked them what their table number meant. It got a lot easier once the first table figured out to answer in the form of, “number of days since…”
Here are the answers:
12862: Number of days since Omar was born.
11561: Number of days since Katherine was born.
67: Number of days we were officially married
2465: Number of days Omar worked at UPS, or number of injury free days for Omar at UPS
762: Number of days since we adopted our dog Maury.
-178: Number of days until the baby is due. (This got quite a few people’s attention. Not everyone knew she is pregnant, so we figured this was as good of time as any to announce to everyone.)
938: Number of days of safe driving for Omar at UPS.
1292: Number of days since we met.
Some people were very fustrated by their numbers. My UPS supervisor ended up having a bit of trouble getting the number of days of safe driving number, but it was a lot of fun to make fun of him with a microphone in a room full of people, many of whom were fellow UPS drivers. His table ended up going to the buffet last, after giving him several big hints.
So when all was said and done, it was a fun activity to keep people occupied during the buffet down time.
I got the day off on Tuesday, so I decided to get a few errands taken off my to do list. I took my car to the shop to get the driver’s side power window fixed, a saw my doctor for my annual check-up, oh, yeah, and I went and married Katherine.
“You did what?” many people have asked. We are having a wedding in June, and we are going on a honeymoon to New York City in May. Since we weren’t really doing anything in the traditional order, we decided to get the paperwork out of the way. It turns out that getting married in Larimer County, Colorado is fairly simple. Katherine filled out the forms online, and the next day we went to the office to get the paperwork. Actually, it is the same place where car registration takes place. The only strange part of the process was the fact that we weren’t allowed to sign the marriage certificate at that office.
So we went home, and in a very beautiful ceremony that involved Katherine, myself, and the dog, we signed the marriage license. We wanted Maury to sign as the witness, but when we put the pen in his paws he kept trying to tear it apart with his teeth. But he watched us– hoping to get a treat when we were finished. The next day Katherine took the paperwork back and now we are officially married.
So now Katherine Herbig is now Katherine Lutfey who gets to change her name. I don’t have do to any of that– I won the coin toss over whose last name we were going to use. We thought of combining our last names, but then we decided that if we have kids and they wanted to get married to someone else with a hyphenated last name they would have four last names, and that just seems like a bit much. So now Katherine has the exciting privilege of changing her social security card, driver’s license, passport, and Starbucks frequent drinker reward card.
I’m getting married in June, which means I’ve got a lot of stuff to do before then. Of course I’m putting off all those things and procrastinating by writing a story about my old myspace profile when I really should be going to the Men’s Warehouse to get fitted for a suit. Anyone looking to meet people on the Internet is going to have to create a profile to describe who they are. A good profile will catch the attention of the type of people you would like to meet. A bad profile will repel these types of people, and, in some extreme cases, get your name permanently added to several government watch lists. Below is my old Myspace profile, along with some pointers in bold.
First of all, I’m a delivery driver in Northern Colorado. Saying where you live and what kind of work you do is a good place to start, but don’t be too specific.
What does this mean to you? I’m pretty active since I’m running around town in a big brown truck 45 hours a week. I have a nice tan, except for the fact that my feet are totally white from my socks. I’m in good shape, except my love for Taco Bell means I have a few extra pounds to deal with. Be honest about your age and physical description. And while I’m on the topic, make sure to put up a reasonably new picture of yourself, preferably looking somewhat happy where your body takes up at least half the image. Sending a picture you took at a bar with 17 other people all wearing novelty Saint Patrick’s day sunglasses isn’t going give the other person much to go on.
Finally, I have a habit of droning on about work related stories, but I’m currently getting counseling and electro-shock therapy to keep it under control. References to electro-shock treatments can be a good ice breaker.
I’m also a writer. Not the kind that had made any money, but I keep plugging away at it. My goal is to get one of my stories on Saturday Night Live or Mad TV. I run a website at Newfunny.com where I put a lot of my writing. Mentioning what you would like to be doing is a good idea. Not too many people work at their dream job, so knowing that your soul hasn’t been crushed from years of cubical nesting gives your profile a positive spin.
What else do I do? I’m currently building an entry for next years Kinetics Race in Boulder. Once I get my hands on some welding equipment and some industrial grade marine Styrofoam I’ll be 80 percent finished. OK, this brings up a concept that many people don’t grasp too well. Many people assume if you write about your strangest hobbies everyone will thing you are crazy and nobody will talk to you. In reality, a certain percentage of the viewers will be turned off by this, but the ones who aren’t will be even more intrigued. For example, saying that you’ve been to one or more Star Trek conventions will make 90 percent of the viewers move on to the next profile, but the remaining 10 percent will be 90 percent more likely to keep reading. On the other hand, saying you like movies and going out to eat isn’t going to win points with anyone. You might as well say you like breathing air and drinking water.
I also like to play pool, ride my motorcycle, and meet new people. I’m very outgoing when I’m working, but more quiet and reserved when I go out socially. For some reason the UPS uniform gives me special powers– I can park where ever I want, ask random questions of total strangers, and of course run to the front of the line at any business without anyone getting mad. Talking about your job is good in moderation. Just remember to keep is positive. Starting a sentence with, “My boss is such a jerk-off for the following eleven reasons…” isn’t the best way to go, even if have detailed documentation to back up your claims.
Who I’d like to meet:
What do I want from a woman? Well, have you ever seen “Lord of the Rings”? All I want is a beautiful elven princess, like, say, Arwin (played by Liv Tyler) who possesses eternal beauty, courage, passion, and kindness but is willing to give it all up for a stuck up, half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf-herder (hmmm… I might be mixing my sci-fi metaphors a bit here). Am I asking too much? If you fit all of these criterion but are only a regular human princess, give me a call. If you are Liv Tyler, give me a call right now. This section is largely a trick question. Many of the things you want from a potential mate you can’t come right out and say in the beginning, like, say, “I want to meet someone who will paint my house on a regular basis. And not just going through the motions either. They need to do all the proper preparation like scraping the old paint, filling in the cracks, and laying a solid coat of primer.” And when you say “paint my house” you really mean something else like “cook all my meals,” “do my laundry,” or “satisfy my deviant sexual fetishes.”
Seriously though, I want a woman with a strong sense of balance. Not falling over too much, being able to ride a bicycle, and perhaps even the ability to juggle a few tennis balls is a good start. But more important is having a balance between your own needs and the needs of partner. Give and take is a big part of a strong relationship. Like saying, “OK, we can watch the stupid History channel special about subway construction (which I’ll bet you’ve already see before) but I get to put my feet up on your lap and so you can rub lotion on them during the show.” or “I’ll do the laundry if you do something about that rotting dead hooker in the trunk.” Another thing about what type of person you want to meet: You don’t need to say that you are looking for someone who shares common interests. That is kind of assumed. Nobody looks at profiles and thinks, “I want someone who is totally opposite than me in every possible dimension so we can just sit at dinner silently night after night knowing that any attempt at communication is destined to fail until the weaker willed of the union can’t take it anymore and, in a fit of uncontrolled anger, throws their dinner plate across the table accidentally decapitating their partner and damaging beyond any hope of repair, the Persian rug sitting underneath the dining room table that had been in your family for two generations.”
So now that my days of online dating are over, I hope this helps out everyone out there who haven’t met/seduced/started stalking their favorite lover. Keep your spirits up, your profile up to date, and your dates full of spirits.