I made it through another Kinetics Race. This was by far the “BEST KINETICS EVA” as our team “Wheel of Miss Fortune” was blessed with a good craft, a great theme, and the undeniably best looking women at the entire reservoir.
Omar (team captain) was sporting a full length formal black dress, blonde shoulder length hair, and a collection of tasteful accessories.
In the interest of full disclosure, Omar concedes he isn’t a natural blonde and is really a dude.
Katherine (support team) displayed a light spring dress and authentic diamond earrings valued at over 3 billion dollars. Katherine and Omar were faced with the dilemma of attending the Kinetics race or celebrating their sixth wedding anniversary. Katherine INSISTED on going to the race in lieu of an expensive romantic dinner despite Omar’s concerns.
Isabel and Samantha (cute children) tied for first place in the Miss Fortune competition and helped the cause by spreading misfortune to the other teams by yelling they were out of toilet paper.
Our craft did quite well in the race. We completed about 80% of the course in the time allowed. The course was significantly longer than last year while still keeping the two hour limit. Only three teams finished in time. I’m sure this little snafu will be fixed for next year. The bylaws of the kinetics charter require that at least one thing doesn’t go as planned.
At the awards ceremony our team won the “Comic Relief” trophy. I’m so proud of this trophy as there were many other teams who gave me a run for my money in terms of their level of crazy.
My only regrets from the race was that I forgot to paint my fingernails, I didn’t wear nearly enough makeup, and my dress didn’t show off enough of my muscular UPS driver calf muscles. I won’t make those mistakes next year.
So now I’m beginning my plans for the 2016 race. I’m going to recruit a larger team, build a bigger craft, ratchet up the crazy four notches, and blow the shark team out of the water. literally. Or maybe they will be sleeping with the fishes. Also, I’m pretty sure next year the race won’t be held on my anniversary. Phew!